I am on holidays and after the bolt of clarity wake up punch to the face, many other things have been stirring in my mind.
I have been chatting with my friend this weekend in Oslo (as you do) about the pressures society places on people.
The classic “what you should do” comment that winds me up so much.
Surely what I should do, are the things that make me happy.
You meet a guy you fall in love, you go out for a year and people ask ” so when are you getting married?”.
You are together more than two years and gd forbid you are not yet engaged and there is something wrong with you.
You get married the immediate focus turns to babies ” so, when are you having kids?”
You don’t have kids – whaaaat the world screams at you! What do you mean you don’t have kids when are you having them, they ask in disbelief!
Gd forbid if you say you don’t want them – this answer is unacceptable. What if you can’t have them, does this possibility cross the curious (sometimes unthinking)
If you leave a high profile, high earning job you hate to take up a “nothing” low income earning job – you have gone mad, lost focus and have no drive.
But what if doing that makes you the happiest you have ever been- isn’t that amazing?
Shouldn’t people be happy for you?
How does your status in life actually affect them in any way at all?
I am lucky I have supportive friends and family who would be thrilled for me if I remained childless and picked up dog poo for a living if that is what made me happy.
I also have learnt that no matter what society throws at me, no matter what people say I should or shouldn’t be doing, if I can do what I do with respect for myself and others, with love in my heart, with happiness for my choices, and pride in myself then at the end of the day what else really matters.